Jokes about Cold & Russia

Refresher from one of my Russian friend in wireline about the freeezzzzing cold temperature. Enjoy!

+20° – Greeks put on sweaters (if they can find them).
+15° – Hawaiians turn on the heaters (if they have them).

+10° – Americans shake, Russians are planting cucumbers.
+5° – You can see your own breathing. Italian cars don’t start. Norwegians take a bath. Russians drive with lowered windows.
0° – Water freezes in America , in Russia it thickens.
-5° – French cars don’t start.
-10° – You’re planning a vacation to Australia .
-15° – Your cat insists to sleep in your bed. Norwegians put on sweaters.
-18° – New York landlords turn on the heaters. Russians make their last seasonal picnic.
-20° – American cars don’t start. People in Alaska start wearing long-sleeves.
-25° – German cars don’t start. Hawaiians are dead.
-30° – Politicians start talking about homeless people. Your cat prefers to sleep in your pajamas.
-35° – Too cold to think. Japanese cars don’t start.
-40° – You’re planning a 2-week hot tub bath. Swedish cars don’t start.
-42° – Transportation stops in Europe . Russians eat ice cream on the street.
-45° – All Greeks are dead. Politicians really start doing something for the homeless.
-50° – Your eyelids start sticking when you blink. In Alaska , people close the window in the bathroom.
-60° – White bears start moving south.
-70° – Hell freezes.
-73° – Finnish special services evacuate Santa Claus from Lapland . Russians wear earmuff hats.
-80° – Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.
-114° – Ethyl alcohol is freezing. Russians are unhappy.
-273° – Absolute zero, atomic movement stops. Russians wear boots.
-295° – 90% of the planet is dead. Russian soccer team becomes the world champion

Cheers!